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What Have You Done To My Water

by Beverly Tender

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1.
kevin’s always pacing through the kitchen. anxious me, i see myself in every step. still water wasting in the hole of sunken linoleum-splash it in an accident! dripping cold sweat off yr feet gotta wonder what its like to be chill. ill try and keep my cool but nothing gets me going like an open wound. can’t throw a sucker punch but i could throw another one, will i regret this my whole life, will i be like this my whole life? tripping on a step at the bar where i lost my-
2.
The dog won't bite if you've got nothing, it wants something. Empty vessel like a vase, a salad bowl's the same. I strain my voice yelling. Chasing the dog through the yard, pry open her jaw. She swallowed something large. Reach down, reach out, your slimy hand holds out a q tip. Beside me, Tris falls asleep, he keeps on mumbling. The sound of the neighbors breaking things, the dog starts barking. My heart is starting to beat. I don't mind the nothing so much when you're around.
3.
Drivey 04:13
Isaac is too high to drive but he does it anyway. We buckle up quick and he chuckles loud, his family around me. Brave the heat! Bottom out in the curves of the street but the trucks never slow down to turn around corners, speedy fuckers, so I keep slow and steady, lose everyone ahead of me. But the trucks never slow down to turn onto highways and the dog on the side of the road doesn't look dead, just bloated. Can you feel it now? Dead deer lying in the road, run through it! Stop at a rest stop over the state line. The car is dripping from inside. Can you feel it now? Run through the red light every day. I hear it from my room, hope it's not you.
4.
Clamor, crying, we came for you. Pulling back, collapse into the lap of everyone who's ever loved you. Everybody loves you. Layers of ice crack beneath your feet, step carefully, reach for Sophie. Winfield leaves for the library. You watch the water writhing beneath.
5.
Please, make it easy on me. I dream that I'm in this dusty city and no one is gunna let you leave. Break out in a cold sweat before you exit the room. Lock yourself in the bathroom. No one's gunna let you out. Skittish liar you're alone with yourself. Sink into the linoleum floor. Sleep with the light on, pull out the futon. Can you see me? Lost your bearings at a stepped bar. Caught yourself on the dusty counter top. Skittish liar try to think it through, the dry heat suits you. No one can see you.
6.
Can You Feel It Now
7.
judith swallowed the mouse that we microwaved; soft body limp, gulped down, a mound in the snakes waist. it moves towards you. you said it's gross, and it is. the snake would eat its own if we didn't watch it like a hawk. stick the snake skin in a letter to your grandmother. you told her it was in the mail already, the guilt overwhelms. cotton body to keep the wings from falling, you thumb the indent but you never do it right.

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released November 17, 2017

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Beverly Tender Providence, Rhode Island

It was a good run thanks everybody cya!

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